Heading for the buffers

It's everywhere.
Popping out of the woodwork.
Appearing from all sides. Contagion.

Relationships, either in conflict, meltdown, armistice or grim resignation. I've spoken to quite a few people now and the state of our marriages or cohabitations seems pretty poor. Several of my friends , who I would have bet good money on them having excellent relationships, have foundered in the late 30s.

Some are plodders, don't give up, stiff upper lip and all that.

Here's one example from a lovely female friend of mine:
'I woke up one morning about 5 years ago and realised I could n't hide from him anymore that i did n't love him. There was n't anyone else and there stil isn't. I just had stopped loving years ago. We stayed together because of the children' they are still together functioning as a 2 man team for their kids. That's all. When I suggested how much more there could be, she shrugged,
'I know, just don't think i'm gonna be able to get that kind of relationship, that's all'

hmmm, does n't want it or too frightened to try?

Surely that's the worst of all worlds. Stating your case and leaving it. Feeling comfortable enough to be with someone but having little in common and whittling through your life, ticking off the days.

Nooooo.

There 's more to life than that, people.

General feeling of relief, it's not just me.

I'm taking her to lunch next week. Of course I am. She suits my purposes perfectly.